While w
orking in his vineyard one afternoon, a farmer’s hoe struck something metallic beneath the soil. Bending down to investigate, he discovered an exquisitely crafted mortar buried in the earth. After carefully cleaning away the dirt, he realized with amazement that the object was made of solid gold.
“Something this valuable must belong to royalty,” he mused aloud. “I’ll present it to the king – surely he’ll reward me generously for such a find!”
When he arrived home, his daughter Catherine was waiting at the door. He proudly showed her the mortar and announced his plans to give it to the king. Catherine studied it carefully before speaking. “It’s absolutely beautiful, there’s no question about that. But I have to warn you – if you take this to the king, he’s going to find something wrong with it. You’ll probably end up owing him money instead of receiving a reward.”
“What could possibly be wrong with it?” he asked incredulously. “What fault could even a king find with such a magnificent piece?”
Catherine’s eyes sparkled with wisdom beyond her years as she replied:
“Your golden mortar may be grand and fine,
But where’s the pestle that makes it shine?”
“That’s ridiculous!” the farmer scoffed. “You think a king would speak in such simple terms? You don’t understand how royalty thinks!”
Confident in his decision, he tucked the mortar carefully under his arm and marched straight to the palace gates. The guards initially blocked his path, but when he mentioned bringing a special gift, they escorted him directly to the throne room. “Your Majesty,” the farmer began with a deep bow, “I discovered this solid gold mortar while tending my vineyard. I knew immediately that such a precious object deserved to be in your palace. I would be honored if you would accept it as a gift.”
The king examined the mortar carefully, turning it over in his hands and studying every detail. Then he frowned and spoke exactly as Catherine had predicted:
“Your golden mortar may be grand and fine,
But where’s the pestle that makes it shine?”
The farmer couldn’t believe his ears – those were Catherine’s exact words, though the king had delivered them with more refinement. He smacked his forehead in astonishment and blurted out, “She predicted this word for word!”
“Who predicted what?” the king asked, suddenly intrigued.
“Please forgive my outburst, Your Majesty,” the farmer replied sheepishly. “It’s just that my daughter told me precisely what you would say, but I dismissed her warning.”
The king leaned forward on his throne, his interest piqued. “This daughter of yours must possess remarkable insight. Let’s put her intelligence to the test. Take this flax and tell her to make uniforms for my entire army. And make sure she knows I need them immediately.”
The farmer stood frozen in shock. But no one dared argue with royal commands, so he quietly accepted the pathetically small bundle of flax, bowed to the king, and headed home. He left without receiving any recognition for the mortar, let alone the reward he’d hoped for.
When he arrived home, he found Catherine in their small kitchen. “My dear daughter, you’re in serious trouble now,” he said, explaining the king’s impossible demand.
“You worry too much, Father,” Catherine replied with a confident smile. “Let me see that bundle.” She took the flax and shook it gently. As everyone familiar with textile work knows, even expertly processed flax contains tiny loose fibers. As she shook the bundle, a few nearly invisible pieces fell to the floor. Catherine carefully gathered these minute fragments and handed them to her father. “Here’s what you’ll do. Go back to the king and tell him I’ll make his uniforms. However, since I don’t have a loom to weave the fabric, ask him to first have one constructed from these small fibers. Once he provides that, I’ll complete his order exactly as requested.”
The farmer was terrified to return to the palace with such a bold response, but Catherine persisted until he finally gathered his courage and went.
The king was thoroughly impressed by Catherine’s clever solution and became eager to meet this remarkable young woman in person. “Your daughter continues to prove her intelligence!” he declared. “Send her to the palace – I wish to speak with her myself. But here’s the challenge: she must arrive neither dressed nor undressed, neither full nor hungry, neither during day nor night, and neither walking nor riding. She must follow these instructions precisely, or both of your lives will be forfeit.”
The farmer trudged home, his heart heavy with despair. But Catherine greeted the news with a mischievous smile. “Don’t worry, Father. I know exactly what to do. Just bring me a fishing net.”
Early the next morning, before the first light of dawn, Catherine put her plan into action. She wrapped herself in the fishing net (solving the dressed/undressed requirement), ate just one small bean (addressing the full/hungry condition), and mounted their old goat with one foot touching the ground (fulfilling the walking/riding criterion). She arrived at the palace precisely during twilight (meeting the day/night requirement). The palace guards were baffled by her bizarre appearance and initially refused her entry, but when they learned she was following the king’s specific instructions, they immediately led her to the royal chambers.
“Your Majesty,” she announced with a curtsy, “I have followed your instructions to the letter.”
The king burst into delighted laughter and exclaimed, “Brilliant Catherine! You’re exactly who I’ve been searching for. I want to make you my queen. But remember this one condition: you must never interfere with my royal duties.” (The king had realized that Catherine’s intelligence surpassed his own.)
When news of the engagement reached him, Catherine’s father spoke with concern. “When a king chooses you as his bride, there’s no refusing him. But tread carefully – someone who makes decisions as quickly as he does can change his mind just as fast. Keep your old work clothes hanging here on this hook. If things don’t work out and you need to come home, they’ll be waiting for you.”
Catherine was too caught up in her happiness and excitement to pay much attention to her father’s warning. The wedding took place within days, accompanied by grand celebrations throughout the kingdom. A massive fair filled the capital city, with every inn packed beyond capacity. Many visiting farmers had no choice but to sleep in the town squares, which were crowded with people all the way to the palace gates.
Among these visitors was a farmer who had brought his pregnant cow to market. Unable to find proper shelter for his animal, he followed an innkeeper’s suggestion to keep her under a shed, tethered to another farmer’s cart. During the night, the cow gave birth to a calf. The next morning, as the proud owner prepared to lead both animals away, the cart’s owner rushed out, shouting, “Keep your cow if you want, but that calf is mine!”
“What are you talking about? This is my cow’s calf – she gave birth to it last night!”
“Of course it’s mine,” the cart owner insisted. “Your cow was tied to my cart when she gave birth. Since it’s my cart, the calf clearly belongs to me.”
The argument quickly turned violent. The two men grabbed wooden poles from under the cart and began swinging at each other in a blind rage. Their commotion drew a large crowd, and soon the palace guards arrived to break up the fight. They arrested both men and brought them directly to the king’s court for judgment.
In the royal city, tradition had always allowed the queen to voice her opinion during court proceedings. However, now that Catherine was queen, she consistently challenged the king’s judgments with her own wisdom. Growing frustrated with this, the king finally snapped, “I warned you about interfering in matters of state. From now on, you’re banned from the court.” Catherine had no choice but to comply, leaving the farmers to face the king’s judgment alone.
After hearing their arguments, the king announced his verdict: “The calf belongs to the owner of the cart.”
The cow’s owner was stunned speechless by such an unfair ruling, but what could he do? The king’s word was law. Seeing the farmer’s distress, the innkeeper suggested he seek help from the queen, who might have a solution.
The farmer went to the palace and approached a servant. “Pardon me, but might I have a word with the queen?”
“That’s impossible,” the servant replied firmly. “The king has forbidden Her Majesty from hearing any legal matters.”
Desperate, the farmer circled to the palace garden. Spotting the queen through the wall, he quickly climbed over and rushed to her, breaking down in tears as he described the king’s unjust ruling. After listening carefully, the queen offered her advice. “Tomorrow the king goes hunting near the seasonal lake – the one that’s completely dry this time of year. Here’s what you should do: hang a fishing dipper from your belt, take a net, and pretend to fish there. When the king sees you and asks why you’re fishing in a dry lake, tell him: ‘Your Majesty, if a cart can give birth to a calf, surely I can catch fish in a waterless lake.'”
The next morning, the farmer followed her instructions exactly. With his dipper at his side and net in hand, he went to the dry lakebed and made a show of casting and retrieving his net. Soon the king and his hunting party appeared. Upon seeing this strange sight, the king laughed and asked if the farmer had lost his mind. The farmer delivered the queen’s clever response word for word.
The king’s expression immediately changed as understanding dawned. “Someone else orchestrated this performance. You’ve been speaking with the queen.”
The farmer didn’t deny it, and the king, recognizing the wisdom in the lesson, reversed his earlier decision and awarded the calf to its rightful owner.
The king then summoned Catherine and declared, “You’ve defied my orders about interfering again. As punishment, you must return to your father’s farm. You may take with you the one thing from this palace that you treasure most, but you must leave tonight and resume your life as a farmer’s daughter.”
Catherine remained composed as she replied, “I will honor Your Majesty’s wishes. However, I request one small favor: let me depart tomorrow instead. A nighttime departure would only cause embarrassment for us both and set the kingdom’s tongues wagging.”
“Very well,” the king agreed. “We’ll share one final meal together, and you’ll leave at dawn.”
Catherine immediately put her clever plan into action. She instructed the palace cooks to prepare an elaborate feast of rich, heavy dishes guaranteed to induce drowsiness. She also had the cellar’s finest wines brought up. Throughout dinner, while the king indulged in course after course, Catherine made sure his goblet never ran dry. Soon his speech began to slur, his vision grew hazy, and he finally slumped unconscious in his ornate armchair, snoring deeply.
Without hesitation, Catherine turned to the servants and commanded, “Lift His Majesty, chair and all, and follow me. And remember – absolute silence, or face the consequences!” She led the unusual procession through the city gates and all the way to her father’s modest home.
“Father, open up! It’s Catherine!” she called softly.
Hearing his daughter’s voice, the old farmer hurried to the window. “Back already? I warned you this might happen! Good thing I kept your work clothes ready – they’re still hanging right where you left them.”
“Less talking and more opening the door, Father!” Catherine insisted.
The farmer opened the door to find the servants carrying the sleeping king in his grand chair. Under Catherine’s direction, they carefully moved him to her bedroom, where she had them undress him and tuck him into her simple bed. After dismissing the servants, she slipped in beside him.
Around midnight, the king stirred from his wine-induced slumber. Something felt wrong – the mattress was too firm, the bedding unexpectedly coarse. Rolling over, he felt Catherine beside him and mumbled in confusion, “Catherine, didn’t I order you to return home?”
“Yes, Your Majesty,” she replied softly, “but it isn’t morning yet. Go back to sleep.”
The king drifted off again, but when dawn broke, he was awakened by unfamiliar sounds – a donkey braying, sheep bleating, and sunlight streaming through a window he didn’t recognize. Fully alert now, he turned to Catherine in bewilderment. “Catherine, where are we?”
She smiled sweetly and answered, “You told me to take home whatever I treasured most from the palace. I chose you, my love, and I intend to keep you.”
The king burst out laughing at her clever solution, and all was forgiven. They returned together to the royal palace, where they continue to rule to this day. And from that time forward, the king never again held court without Catherine by his side.
